Where has my sweet, happy baby gone?

The first 2 - 2 1/2 months of Nicholas' life were rough.  Every night he would scream for hours on end before finally passing out from pure exhaustion.  During the day we were lucky if he would nap for an hour between bouts of screaming, throwing up, gagging, coughing fits and on the worst days, there were times he would start gasping as if he couldn't get enough air.  I never saw him smile, he didn't try to play and some days he would just lay with me on the couch all day while recovering from a particularly nasty episode the night before.  He always looked as though he felt absolutely miserable.  In fact, the picture I took of him on the day he turned 1 month old is probably one of the best pictures I have of him during this time frame and he still doesn't look like he feels that great.

After seeing numerous doctors, making a few trips up to Children's Hospital and some time in the NICU we found out about his reflux and other issues.  It took a little while to find the right combination of medications and dosages that worked for him but once we did he was a completely different baby.  All of a sudden, I wasn't up at 3 in the morning every night with a screaming baby, he wasn't throwing up everything he took in, he wasn't screaming in pain as he had done almost every day before.  The first time he smiled at me was heaven and that laugh, I wanted to cry the first time I heard him laugh.  That laugh meant that he was happy and that he felt good for one of the first times in his life.

The next 2 months were fantastic as he laughed, played and discovered new things.  Things seemed to be going so much better, that is, until about 3 weeks ago.  After starting him on some rice cereal I noticed that some of his tummy issues returned and he developed a rash down the sides of his face.  I brought this up to his doctor and he decided that it was eczema due to his diet, which basically consists of formula and rice cereal so it wasn't hard to figure out which one was causing the problem.  We left the doctor's office with the instructions to discontinue using the rice cereal and apply hydrocortisone twice a day.  It seemed to help a little at first; however, it didn't last very long.  The last week has caused me to relive all of the memories from his first 2 months home.  No matter what solid food we try his eczema seems to get worse, he spends half the night screaming due to horrible gas pains, it's becoming harder and harder to get him to smile.

His pediatrician will be out of the office tomorrow but we have an appointment to see him first thing Friday morning.  Hopefully, on Friday, we will be able to get some answers without it taking 2 months like it did the first go around.  I had my sweet, happy baby for just about 2 months and I want him back.  He shouldn't have to spend so much of his little life in pain.