Saying Goodbye

I've had this post floating around in my mind for a few weeks now but just haven't been able to write it out.  I know having pets is different for everyone.  Some people see them as pets, companions, others see them as members of the family, the fur babies you had before your real babies came along.

I fit into the second group.

My first pet, as I'm sure was the same for many others, was a goldfish and then I graduated up to a hamster when I was 5 or 6.  When the hamster passed away I wanted a new pet.  A real, run around the house and play with toys, pet.  For my 9th birthday, my best friend gave me a kitten from her cat's litter.

This little kitten came to be known around our house as Sugar.  She was sweet, loving and loved playing with balls and string.

She followed me everywhere and slept at the bottom of my bed every night.  While I was in middle school, she would sit in the window every afternoon and wait for me to come walking up the sidewalk.  In high school, when I had my heart broken, she would sit on my lap and purr.  When my grandfather died, she never left my side.

When I started college and moved into my own place, she came along.  For almost 17 years she has seen me through thick and thin, the good and bad, the happy and the sad.  As odd as it may sound, she become one of my very best friends.

She loved to fall asleep in laundry piles in the weirdest positions

It's been a little over a month now since she last sat on my lap or slept at the bottom of my bed.

Everything seemed fine when we fell asleep; however, I woke in the morning to find that she had had a stroke.  She wasn't herself.  She couldn't walk and could barely breathe.  As difficult as it was, we made the decision to call the vet and end her suffering.

Our house is different now.  Quiet and somewhat empty.  The friend that I grew up with, spent the last 17 years with, is now gone.

I'm finding that each day it is getting easier.  Easier to remember the fun we had, easier to forget the pain of that final day, easier to remember the friend that she was for so many years.

It has taken me a month to get to this point.  The point where I can walk past where her food bowl sat without bursting into tears, the point where our other cat no longer sits at the edge of the bed meowing looking for her companion, the point where I can finally say my farewell.

Goodbye Sugar, my pet, my companion, my friend.  You will never be forgotten.

It was truly an honor to spend the last 17 years with you.